Life’s hard. Full stop.
It helps to have good teammates. You know… people who show up for you, encourage you, cheer you on, and who are there for you through thick and thin.
Foundations in sport have taught us what great teammates look like, and hopefully -- to be ones ourselves. Post-competition, most of our “teammates” these days look like spouses, moms and dads, brothers, sisters, girlfriends, colleagues, friends from church, even neighbors, etc.
Who’s on YOUR team?
Several people probably come to mind right away.
Did you put yourself on that list?
Would you??
Seems to me, many of us are really, really good at beatin’ the crap out ourselves sometimes. Myself included. As someone who sets incredibly high-standards for herself and who’s also ultra-competitive and growth-oriented, I can also be very self-critical. Very, very self-critical. While historically, I’d rationalize that being that hard on myself is a necessary part of the process of getting better or “being the best”, I’m at a point where I just don’t know if I believe that line of bullshit anymore.
Thing is, when I actually take a step back and try to (as objectively as possible) reflect on whether or not this self-critical strategy is productive or pushing me higher... I can say with resounding confidence that it's absolutely not. On the contrary, I find much more motivated, less stressed, and less anxious when I extend myself some grace along the way, cheer myself on (even if I'm the only one doing so at the time) while STILL maintaining high standards for myself.
Lately, it’s really sinking in that it doesn't have to be either or -- all or nothing. That you can be someone with incredibly high standards AND ALSO be someone who’s supportive and encouraging of yourself.
So I’m switching up tactics. I’m trying to become more aware of the moments where I’m being a really shitty teammate to myself. And in those moments, I’m trying to be a little more supportive -- a little more encouraging. In short: I'm trying to remind myself to "be on my own team."
The world, our jobs, parenting, LIFE IN GENERAL is already tough enough as it is. Why add to that and "oppose" and beat ourselves up in the process? Starting to feel like a losing strategy, to me -- one I just don’t have fucking time for anymore. You too?
I’m on your team. I hope you're on your team, too.
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